Date: October 07, 2026
Series: Youth for Jesus
Number: Vol. 9, No. 21
“He instructed the one in the lead: “When my brother Esau meets you and asks, ‘To whom do you belong, and where are you going, and who owns all these animals in front of you?’ then you are to say, ‘They belong to your servant Jacob. They are a gift sent to my lord Esau, and he is coming behind us.'” He also instructed the second, the third and all the others who followed the herds: “You are to say the same thing to Esau when you meet him. And be sure to say, ‘Your servant Jacob is coming behind us.'” For he thought, “I will pacify him with these gifts I am sending on ahead; later, when I see him, perhaps he will receive me.” So Jacob’s gifts went on ahead of him, but he himself spent the night in the camp.” (Gen 32:17-21NIV)
Who gave his servants the instructions we have in our opening text? It was Jacob. And on what occasion did he give them the instructions? He gave them the instructions when he was planning to meet his twin and elder brother, Esau, having been away from home for about twenty years.
Now why did he give his servants such very specific instructions? As we see in the account, the reason was that he was looking for a way to pacify Esau. And why did he need to pacify the man? The reason was that they did not part ways on a good note when he left the house.
As bible accounts go, before leaving home, Jacob, with the motivation and assistance of their mother, had used trick to take the blessing that their father, Isaac, had wanted to give to Esau. This, of course, made Esau so furious that he began to nurse the notion of killing him. And when their mother heard about it, he persuaded Isaac to send Jacob far away from home to his uncle, Laban. So, in a sense, one could say that Jacob actually ran away from home because of Esau. (Cf. Gen 27&28)
But then, though about twenty years had passed since that incident, Jacob was not sure if Esau would still not want to harm him. So, when he heard that Esau was coming to him with his four hundred warriors, he had to first spend some time to pray to God about the matter for mercy. Then, on his own part, he had to think of how to pacify Esau with all kinds of gifts.
Therefore, what we have in our opening text is given to us to show something about the effort he made in pacifying his brother. And this is teaching us that if we have truly hurt people and need to make amends, we should not shy away from doing so as quickly as possible. Otherwise, even when decades have passed, the relationship we have refused to heal may still show up to threaten our peace of mind.
Another important lesson to pick from this situation is that wherever we are making effort to heal an injured relationship or to gain someone’s favour, we need to choose our words carefully. As we see in Jacob’s case, even though the gifts he prepared for Esau were quite expensive, he still needed to instruct his servants that would deliver them to choose their words carefully when addressing Esau. Look at what he said to them:
“And be sure to say, ‘Your servant Jacob is coming behind us.’”
Did you see that? He told his servants not to make the mistake of saying to Esau, “Your brother Jacob is coming behind us.” Rather, he told them to say, “Your servant Jacob is coming behind us.” Why? He knew that he did not deserve to be given the treatment of a brother by Esau, for he himself did not treat him as his own brother but as a rival. If he, then, would gain his favour and mercy, calling himself his brother in that hour may be a foolish thing.
So, he chose to abase himself before him, referring to himself as his servant. And he had to make that point very clear to his servants that were taking his gifts to Esau. Otherwise, they may just make a bad situation worse through their wrong choice of words. And that is wisdom.
Now, of course, it was the mercy of God that eventually and actually ended the years of hate and bitterness that had been between these two men. But if Jacob too had not humbled himself in that situation and chosen his words carefully, he may have made it difficult for God to help him, even though he had prayed to Him.
Therefore, even if you are praying to God for mercy or favour in any situation, still learn to choose your words carefully in handling it. Otherwise, if your words do not communicate enough humility, respect and wisdom where you need favour or mercy, even God may not be able to help you. So, mind yourself.
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