“Then I observed that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless—like chasing the wind.” (Eccl 4:4NLT)
We have, by the grace of God, come to another year-end. And as it should be, this is a time in which people should settle down to see how their lives have fared in the year. But while it is important that we settle down to evaluate our lives and affairs to see how things have been with us in the year, the yardsticks we use in doing so are even more important. That is the because the yardsticks we use in evaluating ourselves are what will determine whether our evaluation will be true, objective and reliable as a point of reference or not.
Now among the yardsticks people use in evaluating themselves is the measure of success or failure of their neighbours. And when we are talking about ‘neighbours’ in this sense, we are referring to anyone close enough to us to get our attention. So, that person may be a friend, a sibling, a colleague at work or in school, a church member or a business competitor. Whoever the person is to us, what is happening in their life is important enough to get our attention and make us judge ourselves as progressive, stagnant or retrogressive.
But is it right for us to judge ourselves as a success or a failure on the basis of what is happening or has happened in other people’s lives, even if those people are our blood relatives? No! Why? It is because the word of God says so. Look at the way it puts it: “We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.” (2Cor 10:12NIV)
Did you see that? It is a foolish thing to judge ourselves according to human standards. Yes, it is a foolish thing to compare our lives with the lives of others in order to determine whether our lives are doing well or not. Why? First, it is because God, who created all of us, has made each of us differently, with different potential and abilities. Second, it is because the circumstances of our lives are different, regardless of how closely related or bonded we may be. Therefore, God’s expectations on every life are different.
Since God’s expectations on every life are different, it follows, then, that He will be rating how each of us is doing in life according to those expectations. So, it is how well we meet up with His expectations on our lives that will say whether He will consider us to be a success or a failure, not how well we meet up with what is going in others’ lives or how better we do than them.
Unfortunately, as I mentioned earlier, most people evaluate their lives according to what is going on in the lives of others around them. Therefore, as Solomon tells us in our opening text, their motivation for success in life is envy, the envy of their neighbour. There is, of course, a good side to envy. That is when you envy certain attributes of success or devotion to doing what is right that you see in others, so that you can emulate them. But anything that goes beyond that is of the evil one.
What we are saying is that if the reason you want to be whatever you want to be or have whatever you want to have in life is that you are envious of someone, then, you are missing it. You are simply chasing the wind. In other words, you are going after the impossible. You cannot be another person, however hard you try. And you can never have what another person has unless you steal or buy it from them. Then, even if you possess for yourself what belongs to another person, you can never enjoy it the way they have enjoyed it or will enjoy it. That is because life is designed for each of us to enjoy differently, according to the measure of grace measured out to us by God.
So, stop drawing your motivation from what is happening in other people’s lives but from God’s expectations on your life. That way, you will not be evaluating your life according to their success or failure. This, then, means that you need to know God’s expectations on your life. And you can know them by giving yourself to His word, by praying to Him and also by fellowshipping with others who know Him. My prayer is that you will be guided and strengthened to evaluate your life in this light this year-end, in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Cheers!
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