“David had just said, “It’s been useless — all my watching over this fellow’s property in the desert so that nothing of his was missing. He has paid me back evil for good. May God deal with David, be it ever so severely, if by morning I leave alive one male of all who belong to him!”” (1Sam 25:21-22NIV)
David, as we are told in the bible, was one of those few people that God commended for their unwavering loyalty to Him. In fact, God said concerning him, “I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.” (Acts 13:22NIV) And is there a better testimony that God can give about anyone than this? I don’t think so. That, then, puts David among those saints of old whose lives are worthy of emulation.
However, as we equally see in the bible, it is not everything about David’s life that is worthy of emulation. For instance, as we see in our opening text, David once planned to attack and destroy the entire household of an innocent man. And who was that innocent man? His name was Nabal.
Now someone may say, “Wait a minute! How could you say that Nabal was an innocent man? Doesn’t the bible say that he was a mean and wicked man?” Yes, it is true that the bible says that Nabal was an arrogant, selfish and wicked man. And for being that kind of man, he deserved to be judged and punished by God. (Cf. 1Sam 25:2-3)
However, on the occasion we are dealing with, Nabal was innocent and did not deserve death from the hands of David. Yes, he despised David and his men, when they came to ask him for some material support. And that was not just because he was a stingy man but also because he did not know them and wasn’t interested in knowing them.
At least, this same Nabal threw a banquet for his workers. That means he was not altogether stingy and cruel. If he, then, had known David and his men, as others in Israel knew him, he would most likely have treated them differently on that occasion, that is, with courtesy.
Besides, as the account also shows us, Nabal was not under any obligation to give anything to David and his men. Yes, they served as a shield to his shepherds when they happened to be together in the same area. They did not abuse or molest them or steal from them. Instead, they protected them in whatever way they could. (Cf. 1Sam 25:15-16)
But then, did David and his men treat those people kindly because they wanted a reward from their master? No! Rather, they did what they did because it was the right thing for them to do, as those who knew the Lord and also had His fear in them.
Therefore, the one they should have expected their full reward from was God, whom they had honoured, not Nabal. And even if Nabal was to give them anything, it was supposed to be in form of appreciation and not entitlement.
Unfortunately, on that occasion, David missed it. He got carried away with a feeling of entitlement because of what he and his men had done for Nabal’s shepherds. So, he allowed himself to be offended by the man’s refusal to appreciate them. That, of course, was why he was determined to destroy him and his entire household. And if God had not sent Abigail to stop him in time, he would have become a murderer.
Therefore, don’t be like David in this sense. Don’t be someone that forces others to appreciate him or that victimises others for not appreciating him. Is it good for anyone to be ungrateful? No! But you must realise that the only person that can properly appreciate us for any good we do is God Himself. And He has promised to do just that, when the time is ripe and if we do not give up on doing good. So, whether people appreciate us for our good works or not, God will surely appreciate us at the right time. (Cf. 1Cor 15:58; Gal 6:9; Heb 6:10)
Then we must also not forget that many of us too have been ungrateful in our dealings with God. Yet He does not victimise us or force us to appreciate Him. Instead, He labours everyday to draw our attention to all that He is doing for our good, so that we may gain understanding and begin to duly appreciate Him.
In like manner, we too should allow people to come by themselves to an understanding of the need to appreciate us, instead of trying to take it from them by force. Otherwise, we may end up becoming worse than them, as we oppress, victimise or punish them for being ungrateful to us. And where that is the case, we will not only be robbing ourselves of whatever appreciation that should have come to us from God for our good acts but also exposing ourselves to His judgment. When next you, then, want to take appreciation or gratitude from people by force or manipulation, remember these things.
Cheers!
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